Demystifying how boys view girls with a neutral temperament
As soon as people are born, they carry their genders that are constant throughout their lives. Because of the different genders, they play different roles in social life and cause psychological differences between their sexes.
However, last year’s super girl champion Li Yuchun swept Shenzhou. This slender and handsome girl appeared in front of the super girl’s microphone with an unusual neutral posture. It was refreshing and free, and the typhoon and manner were quite gentlemanly. It won a lot of supporters and set off a “Li Yuchun phenomenon”.
In this year’s competition, there have been many players who imitated her. The girls are also dressed up as neutral, and even dressed as boys.
In particular, some girls in schools are becoming more and more similar, and the gender differences are becoming increasingly blurred, making parents worried and wondering how to deal with this phenomenon.
Some psychological motivations for girls to pursue neutralization are to pursue unconventionality.
In this age of publicity, personality is more fair.
Anti-traditional, seeking new, has become an attractive bright spot for girls.
So some girls can be neutralized to get more recognition.
Some girls never wear skirts, prefer to wear loose T-shirts, talk about their pain and mimic the appearance of boys, and move around on campus; this behavior has attracted the love and worship of other girls.
Adolescent girls are “beautiful”. In their eyes, fashion is beauty.
So I followed suit and followed suit.
Second, the guidance of family education.
Most families have only one child. Parents, considering the pressure of social competition, will require girls to be independent and not dependent on men, so they will train them in a masculine direction.
“Men’s education” includes encouraging children to be able to influence others, lead others in the process of interacting with others, and also be able to engage in some traditional concepts in career choices. It seems that women are not suitable for forced labor.
According to a survey, more than 90% of households currently use masculine methods to educate girls.
Third, do not like their female gender.
A research survey of the “Adolescent Sexual Psychology Study” found that the proportion of female students who are dissatisfied with their gender is 50%.
They are dissatisfied with their own gender because they feel that being a woman means being weak and bullied, being sexually harassed, and learning more and more, but boys are vulnerable to discrimination in employment and other aspects.
Therefore, when they want to be boys, they naturally agree with neutrality in words and deeds.
Fourth, want to get friendship with the opposite sex.
Because girls are always required to be “decisive, restrained, duty, ladies,” because they are easily in a passive state of life and lose the initiative of interpersonal communication and choice.
And very masculine girls, just as they are dressed like boys, their personality can be as straightforward, easy-going, joking, easy to be with the boys in the class, and even can be called brothers and sisters, satisfying their adolescents longing for heterosexualityPsychological needs.
Neutralization of girls is good or bad. Generally speaking, in social reality, boys bear the expectation of “like a man”, and girls also bear the expectation of “like a girl”.
The sum of various personality traits, such as behavioral style, wording terms, style, temperament, costumes and hobbies, which are in line with the expectations and desires of the general society, are called “gender roles”.
If we ask the question “A certain gender personality is the most important and indispensable for women”, then exactly who we ask, the core part of the female characteristics they say are basically the same, even female studentsnot excluded.
These characteristics are: cute, gentle, considerate, etiquette, elegant, delicate feelings, good at dressing and so on.
Now that there are differences in gender roles, there is also expectation of gender roles.
People will ask, evaluate and decide whether to accept every man and woman in reality.
If as a girl, her personality does not meet people’s expectations for female roles, such as recklessness, rough speaking, dressing up, crazy all day, and making noise, others will say that she “doesn’t have a girl like”The tomboy ”therefore disrespected her in attitude, alienated her emotionally, and admitted her in behavior.
For herself, because she cannot get the affirmation, approval and acceptance of others, she will have a lonely, painful and confused emotional experience in her heart, making her many normal psychological needs such as belonging and respected.The needs of love and being loved are not met.
This kind of paresis makes her difficult to integrate with life, and in some cases, it can even cause serious psychological disorders.
However, from a psychological point of view, gender roles are not easy to be extremely stereotyped.
A too feminine and extremely feminine woman often has problems not accepting herself, lacking courage, and possibly creativity.
Conversely, those women who have both the excellent personality qualities of men and women and are in harmony with each other, perform better than women who have only the so-called femininity in many environments.
They have confidence, are good at seizing opportunities, have strong psychological frustration, are open-minded, and are adventurous.
Therefore, some people proposed the concept of bisexuality, that is, the personality characteristics of both masculinity and female psychological temperament, is an ideal personality model.
In this sense, proper neutralization of girls is positive.